Are we fooled ?

One day I met a person selling incense sticks near a pastry shop I went. We gave some money and had a small chat with him to see what his background is. As he told, he's got a daughter of age 16 and he sells insense sticks for a living, while his wife makes paper bags at home. He also showd the inhaler he's using as a medication, which he's unable to buy as they hardly earn something for a day's living. So it was another sad story of a man who was fighting day and night for him family.

Later I was able to go and visit his place using the address I noted down. Though I was able to find his place, a women inside the house said there is no such person. So I was puzzled, and talked with group of people nearby(three-wheel driver, auto shop workers etc). They also confirmed what he said he's doing for a living, but there was another story which they were reluctant to tell. First I was curious why the person denied he's living there. When I heard that he's addicted to drugs, I realized why the people at his place feared to tell details about him. So it was clear that someone has lied to me at some point(either the person or the people nearby). And more than anything, I was frustrated. May be the person has used the money we gave for drugs or may be the people nearby didnt want outsiders to help him. I was kind of lost, but I was relieved a bit after they gave me details of another guy who's lost a leg and doing the same job for about 10 years after he lost his job at a factory. May be that's a genuine case. I repeat "May be".

Going back home, I thought I have to think twice or validate somehow the details before blindly helping someone, even though we try to help with a good heart, it could even make the situation worse.

I think these kind of experiences should not make us stop helping people, as it is not our fault by giving a helping hand. But we only need to be more careful and focus on cases with less risks.

I end this post with a simple message:

~:> Try to help others in every way you can, even if you dont know them... Just think how nice it would be if you get help from everyone else... Start it yourself ~:>

Luxury = Happiness ???

We dream of being a successful people in our lives. What we mean by being successfull is to have a bigger salary at first, so that we can have a luxury life together with our family, which in turn we 'assume' would bring us happiness.

We are about to go on the annual trip from our office, where we need to spend thousands of money per day. At the same time, the person who works in the same office as a cleaner earns the same amount we use to spend for a day at a hotel. But he has to work 6 out of 7 days, 25 days a month to earn the same amount. But we chose to have a high standard buffet, with luxury facilities and hope we are in heaven (for a moment) and assume we will be "happy". I have really felt more happiness, when I bought some food for a begger on the way to office. The smile and the thankfullness of that person is enough to give you a long lasting happiness.

In contrast, we try to "buy" happiness spending huge amounts of money, only to complain about what we didnt get in the end.

Help more, give to those who dont have, that will be with you forever...

Into The Wild

See this, even if you havent seen or read about 'Into The Wild', this will give you a hint about the message...

Its Friday... Yippeee..... hmmm.... ???

We all are waiting till the weekend comes, to relax and have some leisure time. This is my almost identical daily routine...

• Morning - Get up late, hurry up and and leave for work. Feed the dog, (and struggle with him to close the gate without getting yourself dirty.)
  
• At office, its just work and work with some gossiping with friends around
• Evening. Its time to go home, but have unfinished work to do. You find some issue just before you try to leave, so take some more time to fix it as well...
• Take the bus / drive on your way home.. hoping to relax after a tired day. No relaxing while driving with heavy traffic, though I have the luxury to drive my own car. Taking a bus feels better sometimes.
• Buy something to eat, come home and watch anything on TV... trying to relax
• Check emails, Facebook, etc... and work more to earn something more...
• Goto sleep, and repeat the same tomorrow...

So in weekend too, there are work left that could not be done during the week days. Random work, it never ends...

Once you are ready to relax, its Monday again...

Celebrating Special Occasions...

Well, today is just another day for me. But my friends and family friends called and wished me 'happy birthday'. Actually its nice to enjoy more doing something special on such a day, which comes every year. So we at office normally have a small celebration with some food and drinks.

I just thought of doing it differently from this time. Instead of buying my wealthy friends at office a piece of cake, i donated small amount of money for a place where artificial limbs are donated for disabled war heroes. So I informed my friends about my idea and I got several great replies confirming my decision. I was really happy to see I was able to influence at least 2-3 ppl and get them to join with me to help someone in 'real' need.

For most of us living in a luxury life, its just another piece of cake. But for someone who has not had a proper meal in days, its like life saver...

I'm not just trying to be different, I want to do some good and enjoy after seeing what change i could do to them. So next time, before you throw away your money to celebrate something, think twice and use it for a someone in need.

Food for Hunger or ..... ????

We(myself, wife, friend x and y :) were on our way home after about 100km journey. So we were looking to a place to have lunch on the way. One friend(x) said she would spent for the lunch and they were discussing where to eat. It was around 1.30 pm so I was getting hungry already... Friend x and y were arguing on the way to select a better place to eat. X wanted to eat from a reputed an famous place... Y wanted to eat a better meal. I wanted to eat 'something' for hunger... hmmm... then they were arguing for some time, so we almost had to skip lunch, fighting for a 'better' place to eat... if it was some other day, by this time i could have had a peaceful lunch by now... more desires, more problems...

Some try to show off their class by visiting expensive places... Some think they belong to the upper class (in society) just because they can afford to spend money at expensive and famous shops... more desires While the so called poor man ('financially' poor) who may have only very few options are much happier with what he has... may be some think, we will also be rich someday and eat in a better place...

more money, more expectations, more problems...

this cycle continues....

Just Another Day In Paradise

A girl rang the door bell, i checked who it was. She said 'sorry to disturb you sir...', it was another poor girl (financially poor) trying to either sell something or asking for help. I said 'sorry we dont want anything', I didnt want to listen to the long story as i wasnt going to give her anything.

In fact it was not me who wanted something, it was that girl who goes to each doorstep trying to get something she wants. I was busy watching a cricket match(having some leisure time), while that girl might have been trying to earn something for her living... But it was just another day for me in paradise, hmmm.... why didnt I give something ? well, she could be telling lies..since its very common here to find ppl telling various lies to get something... so what, its their problem to lie and earn money, but if we can give something to help them we wont feel anything bad i guess, isnt it ??

I felt really bad after i just ignored her, specially because i also have been through financial difficult times. I once thought I would be a really rice person and start trying helping ppl with my money... thats rubbish.... You never have to be really rich to help someone, even financially. You should always be ready to give with what you have NOW. Then I remembered the Rs. 20,000 I gave about 1 year ago for a friend to his fathers medical treatments. That was almost 1/2 of my salary then, but still i enjoy it very much every time i remember it. And the other special thing about that donation is, that friend still doesnt know I gave that much, so it makes really good too. why is that ? Then you CAN'T expect anything in return for your help !! Normally when we help someone, we natuarally expect the other person to at least remember the help we did, and may be do something in return. Thats when there will be more problems, when you dont get what you expected... again loss of expectations...

So i'll be going out in a while, i'll just trying to help someone today at least for the girl i ignored at my doorstep. !!